This isn't a rant so much as it is an observation.
My husband, Mark, is a truck driver and ever since he got a new route which would enable him to be home every day, we both thought it would be nice to get healthy TOGETHER. (his idea btw) That means eat the same foods and do the same (or nearly the same) types of workouts. Now, he's not overweight at all. He's just needs to tone his tummy a little because he says it really bothers him and he wants to lose it. Fine. (he's been saying this for the past 3 years btw)
At first it was fine - when it was time to exercise, he was on board. (day 1 for him)
Then he would only do SOME of the exercises, claiming that they didn't do anything for him. But after observing him, it turns out he's not doing them properly and taking the easy way out. After correcting that, he wouldn't do as many reps. Ok, fine.
Then, I'd be ready to exercise but he was doing something else like watching tv, so I waited for him to get ready. (I don't like waiting, when I'm ready to go, I'm ready to go! Don't want my muscles to cool)
When we walked, he'd wear jeans, boots, and a polo shirt which tells me he's not really into it even though he insists that he is. I've got my walking shoes on, leggings, t-shirt (complete with sports bra), headband to keep my ratty hair out of my face and my pedometer. I mean BUSINESS!
We agreed that when it was time to go on the elliptical, that one of us would walk laps around the house until the other one was done and then switch. I was on the elliptical but he did not walk. When I was finished, he didn't get on the elliptical - he didn't say why just that he didn't want to do it. Fine. It's his body.
Other times during the floor exercises, he would just stop and start looking at the books and movies on the bookshelf! HUH????
Then last week, I did my floor exercises without him because he didn't want to. After the floor exercises I like to walk while my muscles are still warm. (if I get too cooled down I won't feel like walking plus I won't get the maximum benefit of constant cardio) I told him I would be ready in "x" amount of time and he said he would be ready to walk. When I finished and asked him if he was ready, he was going through the mail so I waited. I started dancing and watching the clock. After 5 minutes of this, I checked on him and we was engrossed in paperwork and at that moment I knew that I was in this alone. I told him I was leaving and to catch up with me if he wanted to. I ditched him and did my own thing. (he caught up with me about 10 minutes after that)
This past week, I've observed his half hearted attempts to exercise and walk and I've decided that he is not a good partner for me. In all fairness to him, I do realize that he's not in the same situation as I'm in so he doesn't have to be as motivated or as strict as I am. But when he holds me back and gets in my way, it's time to make a change.
I cannot and WILL NOT allow this! He doesn't understand that it's imperative that I exercise at least 6 days a week and adhere to strict eating habits. He doesn't understand that I have trouble doing the easiest of tasks. He doesn't understand that if I skip even a couple of days of exercise (like he urges me to do sometimes) that I will either go nowhere or go backwards. So....
I told him that we cannot be partners anymore. He's not motivated because he doesn't HAVE to be but that's not the case with me. I cannot be lax when it comes to this. I'm trying to stay from that "us" vs. "them" mentality but the truth is, he doesn't understand what it's like to be the equivalent of two people and the struggles we go through. If he doesn't want to get on board with this, that's fine but I don't like being held back or encouraged in things that will hurt my progress. Not all married couples have to do EVERYTHING together right? (I just got married so I don't know all the "rules") But from what I can tell, this is best for both us.