Conspiracy Theory

Posted by alittlestone on April 22, 2008 at 3:22pm

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So it's been a while... Not just for the blog, but for the working out and dieting. Happily, I didn't gain any weight while going nutters with food and sitting around watching TV instead of working out. Sadly, and obviously, I didn't lose any weight either. Monday was official "back-at-on-the-program" day.

It didn't go well.

In the middle of working out to my new step aerobics exercise video with my fancy new step ordered off of ebay, I look up to discover my two-year-old has SOMEHOW managed to find a Sharpie and colored ALL OVER the adorable little kitchen we got for them. ALL OVER. So I stop my tape, grab the marker, put the boy on his bum in the corner, and grab a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser. No use. It's scribbled up, and it won't be coming off any time soon. Now I am too mad to work out, plus running late, so the workout is nixed half way through.

Today I tried again.

It didn't go well.

At ALMOST THE EXACT SAME POINT in the video, Ben (my almost-four-year-old) comes up behind me and tells me his knees are dirty. I look. Yes. They are indeed dirty. In fact, they are covered in poop. (He had very helpfully taken his poopy pants off and put on clean underwear though, so who can be mad right?) Sigh. So, I stop the tape and take him upstairs for a bath. After I have wiped off all the poop and settled him into the tub I go out i n the living room to discover my two-year-old has now taken off his diaper and TURDED on the floor. Yes. You heard me right. Argh. No time for a work-out now.

I swear... There is some force working against me here. Some force determined to keep me from looking cute and slim this summer. Either that or the boys like me on the fat side, because I make such a soft and comfortable movie-watching chair.

I'm almost afraid to start that tape tomorrow.

Tags: children, exercise

Comment by Ask The Dietitian on April 22, 2008 at 4:01pm: As Gilda would say, It's always something.

Comment by Natalie on April 22, 2008 at 6:05pm: i had a bad day too. i just found this blog and i hope i can find some much needed encouragement.

Comment by Lisa Newton on April 22, 2008 at 6:39pm: I don't know if it will work, but why don't you get the kids to do the exercise DVD with you? They might like it, and doing it would expel some of their extra energy......................:)

Comment by Christine Braun on April 22, 2008 at 7:03pm: You were up to the elbows. LOL They always say "If at first you don't succeed." Let us know how it goes tomorrow.

Comment by alittlestone on April 22, 2008 at 10:26pm: Yeah Lisa... I have thought of (and tried) that, and many people have suggested it to me. Unfortunately my two-year-old especially has the attention span of a... Well... A two-year-old.

Comment by Lisa Newton on April 22, 2008 at 11:26pm: Yes, I know how that can be, been there, done that.

At least you two mini workouts in, plus, scrubbing the table is great for your arms..................:)

Comment by Sheila Octaviano on April 23, 2008 at 1:33am: About the marker...try using a dry erase marker on a small area. We had to have a profit/loss chart on a dry erase board when I worked at Joann's. We made the squares out of permanent markers and filled in with dry erase markers. The dry erase markers were always taking off the permanent ink. In fact we used to use them when we wanted to add new cells to our charts. It might work.

Comment by alittlestone on April 23, 2008 at 10:10am: I'm on it Sheila. I'll let you know how it turns out.

Comment by Eve on April 24, 2008 at 12:02pm: I've had days like that. You have all my sympathy. When I had youngsters around (I used to care for 3-4 children aged 2 or younger) I put them all down for a nap and then worked out with Lilias (yoga) for 30 minutes. By the time they started waking up, I was ready to deal with them again.

Comment by Cynthia on April 24, 2008 at 12:14pm: I hear ya! My three young cats *know* when I am exercising on my Nordic Track and that's when I hear things going on in other parts of the house. They get into the linen cabinet... once, I'd finished my exercise only to find two of them sitting in the hall with this big pile of stuff between them, including parts from my husband's CPAP water container, trying to look QUITE innocent, but not really pulling it off, LOL!

Another time, I'm on the Nordic Track again when behind me, I hear a big crash. I took a quick glance back and determined there were no shards of glass on the floor and continued until I was done. Cat had gotten on the bookshelf and knocked down several framed photos, sigh. Fortunately, the one that cracked was the cheap Wal-Mart frame, but it was face down and no scattered glass, all nicely contained.

The other fun trick is to dash in front of the NT while I'm skiing furiously, barely missing getting hit by a ski. I've nearly wrenched things but good trying to stop the motion when I see a cat.

OTOH, the youngest came and sweetly licked me yesterday while I was face down panting on the floor after my kneeling plank collapsed. It's not all bad, LOL!