Michelle's Page

Today as I swallowed the lump that had formed in my throat and fought the tears, I couldn't help but think about the transitions that have been occurring in my life. I have always been a very independent woman, and I have always hated relying on other people because I had these high expectations. Slowly, these barriers have been broken since I moved to Austin, and I actually do not mind relying on the friends I have established. But today, after being severely disappointed by the one person I have always trusted and relied on, I realized that I didn't just rely on him, but I was nearly being co-dependent. Me? Co-dependent? What? This is truly uncharted territory for me.

I broke into tears this morning not because I was upset with him (technically I was...but let's look at the bigger picture), but because I feel like I've been trying so hard and I'm still stuck at this same dang weight. Trying and doing, though, are two separate things. "I tried my best" and "I did my best" are very different. Trying is almost like saying that you're ready to propel into action, but you haven't quite decided to actually do it. I have been trying to do a lot of things, but haven't quite done them to the best of my ability.

Where did I go wrong? Why can't I rely on myself and my decision-making skills anymore? How do I find that perfect medium of dependence and independence?

Back in January, I met a guy. No, no, no, nothing ever really happened, but upon meeting him, I knew he was different. Anyway...there were a few quotes on his facebook page that made me feel better...inspired me.

Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets. So love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't, and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance take it, if it changes your life, let it. Nobody said it' be easy, they just promised it would be worth it.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We were all meant to shine as children do. It’s not just in some of us, it’s in everyone, and as we let our own light shine we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear our presence automatically liberates others.

Impossible is just a big word thrown around by small men who find it easier to live in the world they've been given than to explore the power they have to change it. Impossible is not a fact. It's an opinion. Impossilbe is not a declaration. Its a dare. Impossible is potential. Impossible is temporary. Impossible is nothing.

My Walking Maps is a really cool website in which you can track your walking/running routes around town! Check it out, it's super exciting! I mapped the 10K from this past weekend. Google sometimes messes up on this computer, so hopefully you can see the path clearly...

Texas Round-Up 10K
Find more Runs in Austin, Texas

I participated in the Texas Round-Up 10K yesterday morning, and I definitely have a few thoughts...

1. The course was more difficult and challenging than the Capitol 10K.
2. The Capitol 10K had more "cheer" support along the way.
3. The Capitol 10K had more music along the course; although the Texas Round-Up did have more music at the end of the course (I believe).
4. We got to see and hear the governor at the Texas Round-Up. I loved hearing how passionate he is about fitness and health.

I'm not going to lie, I found this 10K extremely challenging for a couple of reasons. First, I lacked a good night's rest the night before, I won't dive into details, but I had a blast Friday night! Secondly, it was humid. Thirdly, the course was tougher!

My accomplishments:
1. My first mile was faster than the 5K (but this first mile was slightly downhill compared to the other one). At the 5K, I did it in 14:15, this time, 13:20.
2. My overall two mile was faster than the 5K. At the 5K, I did it in 30:30, this time, 30 minutes even (maybe a bit quicker than that). Now I do have to say, the second mile was really slow for me, but it was continuously uphill, so the fact that I was till ahead of pace was great!
3. I hit the 5K marker at about the same time as the last race.
4. I finished the race in 1:40:00, pretty much on the nose. Much slower than the first 10K when I was chasing Matt (he timed us at 82ish minutes, I timed us at 93ish minutes), but there are several reasons why. The course was much more hilly, and I have not been training for hills as big as these. In addition, due to the hills, my heart rate got into a range in which I was not comfortable with, so I had to slow down a few times. On the hills, if I was jogging, it was in the 85-90% of my maximum heart rate, which is never the case when I'm at the gym.

I'm not sure when my next race will be, it may be the Lone Star 5000 mid-May...we'll see!

I had a really busy weekend, but had so much fun!!!

I had a potluck dinner with a few good friends on Friday night. My friends just built their house, so they have a number of projects they are still working on. I asked them if they need any help, or would like any, and they accepted. They mentioned that they may let me work with the jackhammer. Super exciting if I can! I like big machines!










On Saturday night, I went with my two Michigan buds to my first Round Rock Express game. The Round Rock Express is the Triple A club for the Houston Astros. Even though the Express lost, it was a great game and a lot of fun. Our section actually won a prize! We're going to plan another outing on a Friday night and take over a whole section. Oh yeah, for those who don't follow sports, this is baseball! :) Yee-haw!

The Oasis is known for its sunsets; and yes, the picture to the right is just one view of Lake Travis from the Oasis. This restaurant and bar is a must-see (in the top 10) if you ever come to Austin. I've always wanted to take a salsa dance lesson, but have never had a partner to go with, and Juston didn't know about this sweet spot, so we decided to go to the Oasis for Sunday evening. I can't wait to go salsa dancing again!

I did learn one big thing from this weekend; I'm a pretty good leader, not a great follower (especially in dancing). Sometimes, just sometimes, I should be a better follower than leader. Hmmmmm...